Dating is wild and dating apps are often messy. Factor in navigating them as a disabled person and… wow.

After my last breakup, my friends forced encouraged me to join a dating app. It was 2020 and the height of the covid-19 pandemic isolation, so I was lonely and agreed. I met a few good friends, but overall, it was extremely negative.

I quickly decided that wasn't for me and also gave myself a break to heal and focus on myself - as a single woman.

I definitely needed that break and healed my heart. So when I heard about a dating app specifically for disabled people a few months ago, I decided to give it another try - but just on an app for disabled people. If nothing else, I could meet more of my community; however, I'm open to the possibility of a romantic relationship now.

Dateability was created by two sisters, Alexa and Jacqueline Child, after Jacqueline experienced nasty ableists on a dating app. So many of us have experienced the same thing, and they realized the need for an inclusive space.

The app has the standard:

• Name & age

• Location

• Bio

• Job & education

• What you're looking for

• Gender & height

• If you want children

• Political views

• Religion

• Some interests

Then, you can add your vaccination status and your “disability deets”:

• Able bodied

• Ambulatory wheelchair user

• Blind

• COVID cautious

• Chronic illness

• Chronic pain

• Deaf

• Emotional support animal

• Food allergy

• Fragrance free

• Immunocompromised

• Intellectual disability

• Learning disability

• Limb difference

• Low vision

• Mental illness

• Mobility impairment

• Mobility aid

• Neurodivergent

• Non-disabled

• Permanent medical device

• Physical disability

• Powerchair user

• Psychiatric disability

• Service animal

• Sign language

• Speech impairment

• Wheelchair user

• Other (and type in)

Which is a very extensive list that covers most of the major things you encounter on a date. Especially now that my disabilities are more visible, I prefer to be very upfront about them and weed out the people I don't want to waste time on.

I was afraid that there wouldn't be very many people on the app, but there were more than I expected! It allows you to filter by location, gender, and age on the free version and others on the premium version. You're also able to add 4 - 6 photos (with alt text) and can have a few frames too.

It was a very easy setup, and searching through profiles was just as simple. Instead of swiping, you press a green heart icon on the right or a red X icon to the left. If both people press the heart, it's a match and you can begin messaging!

The app is still fairly new, and does have some kinks and glitches in it. If you send a link, you can't click on it and you're unable to select the text in a message to copy and paste somewhere else. This can be a nuisance if you're exchanging songs or something with a link! Occasionally, the notifications just take a little surprise nap - but honestly, same.

Even with a few little quirks and not a massive budget (a la Tinder), I still would highly recommend it! I've had a great time making more spoonie friends (many just use it to meet more disabled people) and building community!

Did I meet anyone particularly interesting? Perhaps…

Sources

https://info.dateabilityapp.com/