Spoonful

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Chronic SOS - May 20, 2023

Still a lot of waiting around and recovering from yet another UTI! Fingers crossed that I can get in earlier than my current appointment.

In honor of someone's birthday, I'll be focusing on sharing some wrestling stories of Andre the Giant.

Sometimes when you push every muscle, you push more than you expected! The combination of pushing and effort on your abdomen can be a bad time. Add in sudden hits, like in wrestling, and it can be REALLY bad!

Because this birthday guy enjoys gross humor and fitness, the obvious answer is to talk about some Andre the Giant stories.

In addition to the late wrestler being known for his farts and fart jokes, he had two very famous pooping accidents: one on a plane and the other in the ring.

On a flight to Tokyo, Andre needed to poop, but he was too large for the airplane bathroom. They improvised by pulling the curtains and getting a large garbage bag for him to defecate into. According to fellow passenger and wrestler, Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake, Andre unleashed hell from his bowels.

It was extremely loud and the smell was horrendous. Passengers were falling out of chairs, screaming, crying, gagging, and vomiting. According to survivors, it filled up half of a big trash bag, which flight attendants struggled to bag up while holding towels up to their noses and mouths. They bagged it multiple times and sent it to the bottom of the plane (I assume a trash chute or a cargo area).

He walked back casually and said, "give me some wine, boss!"

Andre was 7’4

Though pooping during wrestling matches isn't uncommon, Andre has the most well-known pooping accident in the ring. Due to a mixture of force, tequila, and a stomach virus, Andre had diarrhea on Bad News Allen while attempting a butt bump to the face.

The more he tried to control it, the worse it was. Bad News Allen ran out and immediately showered. It's unknown what else happened afterwards, but I assume the match was stopped. Hopefully, Andre took some imodium and rested.

Bad News Allen became known as Bad News Brown following the match.

Hopefully your birthday stinks less than these stories! Happy birthday, ya nasty!


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